Arc of Spectral Colours

In two days, I embark on a journey of reflection, and opening a vault of emotions. This trip was not a planned vacation, yet two months ago, a seat on a plane already bore my name on it. The issue is that I was never informed. My unexpected travels to Maui, and this blog, would come on the heels of great loss. To quote Lao Tzu-  Life and death are one thread, the same line viewed from different sides. My life was fragmented into splinters of anguish, rage, denial, and utter sorrow on the afternoon of Deccember 12, 2011, when I was told, my only child-my beloved daughter- Shayla Rae Dawn had lost her life to a horrible car accident. My heartbeats seemed non-existent after that; my skin prickly to even the air I dared to breathe. The jagged framents of my ruptured soul, betrayed me with the movements of my heaving body. I could not fathom how or even when I would ever begin to live a second of my own existence, without my babygirl in it. Yet, a pinky promise made to my daughter is now rooted in words of flight, that I never dared would ring true. Shayla, had made me make a solemn oath that if ever anything happened to her, that I would not merely carry on, but I would thrive! Looking back now, I only agreed to such passing nonesense as I believed my daughter would live to the ripe old age of 102. Yet, the colliding manner of death taking her life, sent me into a spiral of upheavel. I could not comprehend my world without her in it; my existence revolved around my precious babygirl. There is a delicate balance of losing someone you deeply loved and allowing yourself the space in time, where you make the ultimate decision. Instead of focussing on someone's death, you chose to honour, embrace and pay tribute to a life so vibrant; it exudes an arc of spectral colours splashing your soul. My choice and my journey to Maui is to commemorate Shayla's legacy by celebrating the 21 years I was blessed to have known and loved her. It is my hope that my angel-girl will be watching over me and encourage me to "Taste the Rainbow."